October 23, 2011 – Of Bears and Boating

I learned this week…

…that Geoffrey Chaucer’s The Miller’s Tale is bawdy, raunchy, and not unlike a lot of off humor comedies in popular culture. It’s not usually the kind of thing I find entertaining. I mean, I think I am the only person on the planet who was offended by The Hangover. Having said that, this particular sequence in The Miller’s Tale was so unexpected that I couldn’t help but laugh out loud – after I figured out what exactly Chaucer was referring to:

The night was pitch dark, coal-black all about.

Her rear end through the window she thrust out.

He got no better or worse, did Absolom,

Than to kiss her with his mouth on the bare bum

Before he had caught on, a smacking kiss.

He jumped back, thinking something was amiss.

A woman had no beard, he was well aware,

But what he felt was rough and had long hair.

—The Canterbury Tales, The Miller’s Tale. Geoffrey Chaucer.

O.M.G.

…that in-class group projects suck. Not because I am so anti-social that I am loathed to interact with my classmates….huh? Oh, shut up.

…that my daughter seems to be embroiled in a sort of love triangle – with brothers! She has made friends with two brothers, one in 7th grade, the other in 5th. They live just around the corner from us and have become something of a fixture around the house. I believe that she has a bit of a crush on the older boy, however, both boys appear to be quite smitten. I see heartbreak, tears and a trip to Sonic for the consolatory M & M blast in our future.

…that I really hate chronic complainers. So much so that I find that my favorite new past-time is complaining about their complaining. The irony is not lost on me. However, at this time, I am going to choose to ignore the hypocrisy and continue complaining about other people’s complaining.

…that it was time to decatify my house again. It seems like I just did it, but the dust bunnies rolling out from beneath the couch told a different story. I spent my Saturday moving furniture, vacuuming, dusting and polishing. With five cats in the house, we will never be completely cat hair free but, at least for now, it is safe to sit in my favorite chair again.

…that I really hope the Libyans have a plan.

…that sometimes my sweet-natured daughter needs to be reminded that I am empress of my domain and this empire does not lean toward democracy. Luckily, she usually only needs a small reminder and peace is quickly restored.

…that at first glance my Western Civ test study guide appeared harmless. Boy, was I wrong. We are closing in on ten pages and I’m not done yet. I have a feeling this guide will be my constant companion until Thursday’s exam. After that, I just might have a celebratory burning – and a swig of something potent.

…that my daughter is at the age where doctors begin to encourage the HPV vaccination. At her annual well check this week, her doctor (who has treated her since she was born and knows me very well – deals with me very well) urged me to have it administered. I declined. I’ve done a lot of research on this – both for and against – for a series of papers last year. I see both sides of the controversy, but do you know what my biggest issue is? Rick Perry’s mandate. I’m still pissed about that. I will revisit the issue next year. Maybe I will feel differently.

…and last but not least, this week’s awww moment is brought to you by three little piggie bums.